"Being without you is like a biscuit without gravy."
"I need you like someone with the squirts needs Pepto Bismol."
"You make me so excited, I just can't hold my bladder."
"I wanna be close to you like a leech on an abrasion."
"I want you like a dog wants a muscular leg."
"You mean more to me than a Buy one, Get one Free Coupon at Waffle
"I want you more than a Romulan wants to kill a Klingon."
"I want you more than the nastiest heroin addict needs a fix from a
"Its either you or the dog but I gotta sleep with someone tonight!"